Let me tell you about the year I learned the hard way why you don’t hand-draw Super Bowl squares with a Sharpie five minutes before kickoff. Picture this: my living room packed with neighbors holding paper plates of Buffalo chicken dip (RIP to my white couch), my golden retriever Sampson circling for fallen Cheetos, and me frantically scribbling a grid on the back of an old Pizza Hut menu because I’d forgotten to print a real template. By halftime, three people argued their “3” looked like an “8,” someone spilled Sierra Nevada on the smudged numbers, and I ended up Venmo’ing refunds like a walk of shame. Never again.
Here’s what 4 years of Super Bowl hosting disasters taught me about squares templates:
1. Keep It Stupid Simple (K.I.S.S. applies here more than your cousin’s third marriage).
The best template isn’t fancy – it’s functional. I’ve tried neon colors (printers hate that), elaborate team logos (wastes ink), and even a QR code system that confused my Aunt Carol. Now? I use a basic 10×10 grid from PrintableBrackets.net (free, no email required – because who needs more spam?). Print three copies: one for the fridge, one for the coffee table, and one backup for when Uncle Rick “accidentally” uses it as a coaster.
2. Assign numbers RANDOMLY – trust me.
My rookie mistake: letting people pick their own squares. Cue the chaos of everyone fighting over “lucky” numbers while the pregame show blared. Now I write team names (Chiefs/49ers this year) on index cards, shuffle them face down, and let guests draw from a Patriots helmet I thrifted (irony appreciated). No drama.
3. Digital? Yes, but…
Last year, half our crew watched remotely. I tried Google Sheets – nightmare. Tiny cells, accidental edits, and my buddy Dave kept adding GIFs of Gronk spiking a turkey. Solution: screenshot your paper grid, text it to the group chat, and update scores manually. Low-tech wins.
Oh! Payment pro-tip: Collect cash upfront. In 2021, I fronted $200 assuming “everyone’s good for it.” Still waiting on Derek from accounting.
FREE TEMPLATE HACK:
Grab my go-to grid here [imaginary link: YourSuperBowlSquares.com/coffee-stained]. It’s got bold lines, clear quarters marked, and a snack stain aesthetic that says “I’ve got this under control” (even if your queso’s burning).
At the end of the day? The template’s just a tool. The magic’s in the groans when the score hits 0-0 at the end of the first quarter, the high-fives when someone wins $50 on a safety, and Sampson inevitably stealing a celery stick. Happy printing – and may your squares be luckier than my fantasy football picks.
(P.S. If you forget everything else: Tape the grid to a clipboard. Learned that after my cat knocked it into the guacamole.)