Okay, let me start by admitting something embarrassing: the first time I tried writing a song in The Sims 4, my Sim composed a track so bad, her neighbor literally slapped her. (True story. Mortimer Goth did not appreciate her avant-garde keyboard banging at 2 AM.) But hey, after three summers of turning my Sims into accidental musicians — and surviving way too many angry townies — I’ve cracked the code. Here’s the real-deal guide I wish I’d had.
The “Oh, That’s Why My Sim Sounded Like a Dying Accordion” Moment
So you buy a piano or guitar, click “Write Song,” and… crickets. Or worse, your Sim creates a masterpiece called “Untitled Melody #37” that earns §1 in royalties. Been there. Turns out, skill level is everything — like trying to audition for America’s Got Talent after one ukulele lesson.
Here’s what I learned the hard way:
- Level 1-3: Your songs sound like a cat walking on a synth. Royalties? Maybe §5 a week if you’re lucky.
- Level 4-6: Suddenly, you unlock genres! Country, pop, whatever that “simlish opera” thing is. Royalties jump to §50-100.
- Level 7-10: Now we’re talking. My Sim wrote a hip-hop track called “Blicky in Britechester” that made §300/day. Cha-ching.
Pro tip: Stick with one instrument. Switching from piano to guitar resets your progress (learned that after wasting 12 Sim weeks).
The Coffee Hack Nobody Tells You About
Early on, I’d make my Sim write songs for hours, only for them to pass out mid-chorus. Then I discovered mood buffs. If your Sim is Inspired (lightbulb icon), they’ll write faster and earn more royalties. How?
- Cheap method: Hang “Inspired” paintings around their practice space.
- Lazy method: Brew endless coffee. (Basically Sims Red Bull.)
- Chaotic method: Marry a Muse. (Okay, that’s the Get Famous expansion, but still.)
Royalties Are Your New Best Friend (Seriously)
Here’s the game-changer: Once a song’s written, your Sim gets lifetime royalties every week. It’s like Spotify payouts but actually survivable. My legacy heir funded her mansion just by writing emo ballads as a teen. Two tricks I swear by:
- Update old songs. Every few Sim months, click “Update Lyrics” — royalties refresh to match your Sim’s current skill level.
- Perform everywhere. Busk at parks or cafes to earn tips while gaining skill.
The Secret Sauce: Embrace the Weirdness
Simlish song titles are half the fun. Let your Sim’s personality shine:
- My gloomy vampire writes stuff like “Eternal Nightshift at the Lab” (level 10 violin + Very Sad mood).
- My college Sim cranked out “Midterm Meltdown Mambo” during finals week.
And don’t stress about “perfect” songs — the game’s algorithm is kinder than actual music critics. One of my Sims wrote a jazz song called “Llama After Midnight” that still pays her grandkids’ bills.
Bottom Line? Let It Suck First
Your first few songs will be hot garbage. That’s okay! Mine sounded like elevator music for a dentist’s office. But keep grinding those skill levels, stock up on coffee, and lean into the chaos. Before you know it, your Sim will be the next Simlish Billie Eilish — or at least rich enough to buy that ridiculously priced rocket ship.
Now go forth and compose something that’ll make Mortimer Goth regret his life choices. (Bonus points if you dedicate it to him.) 🎹🔥